Saturday, July 01, 2006

Fucking stupid chav dumb cunt faced arsehole wank cuntfucker bastard morons

There has been a car alarm going off outside at very very loud level for about two hours. Sure, not constantly going off, for every few minutes it stops, pressumbably as the owner of the said car comes out and turns it off. The scilence normally lasts maybe thirty seconds to a minute. Judging by where the sound is coming from at the back, and the sound itself, I'd say it were the same one that was going off the other morning a few days back, its at the same pitch and frequency of repitition. so far as I've been typing this it has beeing going, stopped, restarted, stopped, and just restarted again. Even I would imagine that your average stupid cunt faced arsehole dick head stpuid moronic cunt of a fat chav wanker would have gotten a bit bored of having to keep going out and turning it off by now. I was going to go to bed about half an hour ago, I'd just finished a can of cold guinness and had a cigarette, when I realised it would be a pointless effort. So I rebooted the computer to log on to HooToo to find something to do for an hour or so, maybe doing some more editing on the respiration guide entry or looking at the floyd rose trem enty and trying to figure out where to go with that, or even finishing off the princess Louise pub (High Holborn) entry. Of course the site now appears to be down. fucking great I'm getting more and more loathed to log on each and every bluddy time now. if its not the site being down due to technical problems, its having to be drawn into 'political' discussion of the latest poor bit of judgement by the Italics on 'grayboxing' conversations or modding this that or the other bit of the site. Great. A bunch of shouty wanker moron chavs just walked down the street, 'talking' to each other about ten times louder than anyone would need to even if it were broad daylight and the road busy and full of people. Good they've gone. Oh, has the car alarm finally* stopped* for the night? seems a longer scilence than anything previously in the last three hours. I should probably try to go to bed, have to do housework tomorrow as for the first time in ages lodger is actually out. Fuck I'm bored, and fed up living here without a job or nothing to do half the time. Still can't make my mind up on weather or not to buy the powered monitors and mixer and new soundcard I sourced, they all seem to have good reviews all seem to be in my price range and should do all if not more than I want, I'm pretty sure they'l go together well, and not bad at about £115 for the three together. Several things I should be thinking about buying at the moment, a new matress for the spare room, a new fridge, and I'm thinking about popping out during the week and buying a new shirt and pair of jeans for the meet. Oh the fucking meet. Where the fuck is everyone? Its in fucking London, how on earth many resurchers must live in or within a half hour or so's train ride of London. You think a few more could be a bit sociable. Not even any of the Italics are going to make it this year, me thinks it'l be a bit of a lame affair. If it is then I doubt we'l bother having another meet of this type; probably go for more of the mini meet flavour of meet, without having to book an entire pub, just pick a fairly large one that is open and hopefully not too busy on a Saturday night.Fuck. the car alarm just started up again. fucking great. If I could see I'd go out now and make the guy turn the alarm off perminatley.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Ten pin fish n chips

Out to Ten Pin this evening, first league match. Actually was out ten pin again on Thursday just gone, in the afternoon, had a bit of a hangover then but got a good score or two. Yet again tonight when faced with the total lack of any drinkable fermented vegetable products worth dinrking I resorted to going non alcoholic, and had an orange juice thing, which was quite alright as far as non alcoholic drinks do except for I'd not expect to be drinking em late in the evening... Came back and went to the chippy on my road on the way home to get dinner as it was quite late by now, so got fish n chips, rather good and the first time I've had fish and chips in yonks. Got a call from 'e' today earlier on seeing if I wanted to go out tonight to the pub, which normally I'd have said a 'yes' to, cept for me being at the ten pin tonight so couldn't really cancil that to go to the pub with him. Looks like he's busy for the rest of the week, so more than likely we will go out at the weekend, probably Saturday. fuck cunt wank badger arse bastards; the stupid fucking football world cup bollocks is starting soon so I'll actually have to pay some attention to what matches are on and when, just to be able to avoid going to the pub at the times they are on, and having to put up with a bunch of stupid fucking football supporting wankers filling the places up to the rafters with their inaine moronic bolocks and making everywhere really quite abnoxious a place to be. Oh well, at least that won't be a problem in a years time, once they've banned smoking in pubs and I never go into one again. fucking fuck faced fucking fuckers, banning fucking smoking in fucking pubs the cunts, to say I'm a bit annoyed about the smoking ban is putting it mildly; its distroying the only passtime and thing I enjoy. fuckers. Bluddy hell those fish n chips were nice though. Four quid!? for a bag of fish n chips? bluddy hell thats gone up a bit since the last time I bought any.... oh well, I'll be able to eat out all the fucking time once the government has banned me from every pub in the fucking country.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Just another weekend

Saturday Should have been going over to visit C on Friday, but couldn't because he has a problem with one of his teeth, so Saturday got up earlish got ready as if I was going down to visit, but awaiting on call to see if the tooth was any better. It wasn't So I didn't go down, yet another weekend no sex... arse.... So gave E a call to see if he wanted to go out for the evening, which he did, so we went out.... E came round about 7 then we went to teh alex, had 'alfresco', 'striker', and several of guinness as well. some relaly abnoxious loud drunken fucking morons in teh pub made it horrible for everyone, they left a short while before we did, but luckly they didn't go to the pub we went on to... Then went to the Kingston, had a few pints of Batemans XXB, and a lot of summer lightening, plus some entire stout, got a two pint take out of the batemans and a two pint takeout of the summer Lightening. Left at about 12.20 as they open a tadge later on a Saturday, and went back to e's. Drunk the beer over the next few hours and smoked a ton of dope, and then had some cider, followed by a bottle of Claret, which was rather nice and all the better for E having followed my suggestion and left it for a year after he got it (we tried a bottle from the case when he first bought it back from France and it just tasted very* young). Got a cab home at some time after 3 Am, finished off the last of the guinness I had at home went to bed nearly 5 AM. ... Sunday Got up fairly late pottered about did some stuff in the house, didn't eat anything. Went to pub at about 9 ish, had several pints of summer lightening and also a fair few of the Batemans again, again at the kingston. Came home, notice I'd not eaten all day and was starving hungry ordered out for food of which I ate most of... now very tired and no booze in the house, and a distinct lack of sex debauchery and drugs an everything... only got a few cigarettes left, but plenty for tonight and to have a couple in the morning, will go to newsagents tommorrow, and probably also to the bakery and perhaps also the farm shop, though I might leave the farm shop till Tuesday when they'l be getting in fresh veg especially mushrooms as I bought the last few they had on Saturday.... bored... tired... no alcohol in the house.... no sex...

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Pissed

No I'm not pissed

Was mildly pissed to almost total Grifty oblivian on Wednesday night, went to the Alex, had a pint of Trophy, then Ridlies Rumpuss, then two pints of Guiness, then went to the kingston, had two pints summer lightening, then a pint of Mill Brewery beer I can't remember the name of, then two pints of the ST Peters brewry mild, which was rather nice, then finished off with two pints of summer Lightening. Left the Kingstone and went to the Swimmer ( the swann), had two pints of ridlies rumpuss and a pint of guinness. Went back to Ed's had a couple litres of cider before getting a taxi home, had a couple cans of guinness and sat up watching bollocks on TV till Fairly late and went to bed.

Its just a bit awkward having a piss full stop at the moment

Towards the middle of this week, we began noticing the toilet was behaving oddly, slurring a lot and generally not seeming its normal peerky selft.

We isolated the problem to be the split pin on the connection to the inside of the handle, but as it turned out, this had bent a section over time, and also screwed up the diaphragm...

So today, Lodger, who used to work in a plummers type role, and hence who speaks the unique language peculiar to plumming, and hence is able to go to a plummers merchants and buy stuff without being treated like a know-nothing member of the public, and hence sold stuff we don't want... He got an entire new thing for inside the cistem.... Which He fitted today...

Bugger bugger bugger bugger bugger, the washer between the out pipe as it connects to the bowl, at the base is buggered... so we have to wait till the plummers merchants reopens to get another....

Windowless void

So I'm sitting in the windowless void of the guitar room, in a house that is a toitletless void

off out tommorrow

Off tommorrow out to get a new Hi Fi amp If I find a nice one, check the DWP paid in the back money they owe me, then out for an Indian and to the pub

Its a hard life....


Sunday, May 14, 2006

Lazing on a Sunday afternoon

Feeling quite tired.... havne't been to the pub in ages... Too much blood in my alcohol system.... Leg still hurting quite a bit, I think having buggered up my ankle I've been walking oddly, which is kinda putting odd pressure on the leg in ways not normally done when walking normally, so both legs feeling a bit odd... Bluddy bluddy annoying.... Going to go back into the loft this afternoon to give it its final sort out and organise everything neatly, then I might also today think about cleaning up the guitar room once its empty (when the stuff in it that I don't want in there is in the loft), and then think about moving the studeo stuff from the spare bedroom down to the guitar room, and the French dresser back into the spare bedroom once the desk, PC, amp, mixer and guitars and keyboard and drum machine etc are safely installed in the guitar room... then later on in the week can consider giving the house a damn big good clean right through.... Still haven't got round to transfering the notes I took whilst away at my Dads from the smartphone/PDA to the PC in order to upload em on to here as a Blog of the period I was away, along with such highlights as the introduction of 'the London cowboy' to the blogging world, and the storey of how I managed to injur myself.... So just this short note for now in order that the blog doesn't think I've forgotten it and wonders off in a grumpy mood..... Good news the other day finally sorted out my benifits and theyre crediting my bank account with £2K of back payments... finally....

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Ten Pin Drinking

Well yet another nights Ten Pin Bowling last night, didn't win this time, but got a fairly simular score to the previous time, got 101 this time...

Was very thirsty whilst at the bowling alley, as they had the temperature turned up really fucking high, so I was forced in to having a pint of fucking horrible John Smiths Extra Smooth. What a load of total fucking wank that drink is... I can't imagine for the life of me why its such a seemingly popular drink.

After ten pin bowling got the bus back towards this way, and went to the Alex, meeting up with E, was a bit late getting there so he was already one pint ahead of me. I got a pint at the bar. I drunk the pint at the bar, so it was empty by the time the barman came back with my change, so I got another pint. The first two were Triumpth, which wasn't too bad, but I then had a pint of guinness, but noticing they've put the fucking price of the guinness up I then switched to speckled hen, a having about four pints of that. Not too bad considering I managed at least seven or eight pints in the time I was there, which was a little over an hour and a quarter.

Came back here with E after the pub, and finished off half a bottle of glen Livit I had hanging about, and I went to bed at about 3 AM.

Woke up before my alarm today, and now about to get ready to head off to the station this afternoon and get the train to Norwich, and thence on to Lowestoft, to go to my Fathers.

Thats right folks, I'm going away for about a fortnight to my Fathers, to drink lots of adanams and locally brewed beer from Oulton Ales, and GreenJack Brewry, both of which are in Oulton Broad/lowestoft. So plenty of drinking coming up in the next fortnight, pity I won't be able to write about it all here

Unfortunately I won't have any internet access whilst away.....

please don't panic at this interuption in your surfing;normal service will be resumed once we know what 'normal service' is


Monday, April 17, 2006

Instant Insult

Well finally something to make my day.


Certainly something to almost go some way to not quite making up for this miserable bank holiday easter weekend.


Potentially something to really have made the week, if not the month, or even the year thus far almost worth its abnoxious pointless boring time...


Yeh, its as cheesy as all hell, and really quite naff I guess, but its just so cuel.


Its a piece of freeware for my Nokia 6630 symbian OS smartphone.


Its a 'random insult generator' piece of software.


The insults are pretty crap though, and I've not seen one yet with a single fucking swear word in it.


here, then, for the entertainment of everyone out in the intardnet land, is an insult generated live, on my phone in the spare room in my house in Cambridge.

Your Funky aunt brushes a punpkin in the forest!


fuck me, that was great, heres another


Your Crazed cat rides on a peanut in a car park!


Actually these are kinda surreal in a way I muchly approve of.


Anyone who's mobile number I have may expect to randomly recieve any of these at random times whilst I'm pissed....; It has a neat feature so you can automatically put the text of the insult into a text message.


Oh, I hear the cries of adulation for this gem of a piece of software, so, for the adoring fans out there, lets have one more for luck...

Your insane Brother carries a chicken in a bakery!

Heck I really like that last one, kinda poetic in its visualisation of the scene there, wouldn't you say? I mean, yeh, I can see what its getting at; how c-crazy would your Brother really have to be to carry a chicken in his bakery? Pretty damn crazy is my guess, answers on a pissedcard to your Brother..

Your senseless Grandmother kisses an armchair at school!

Sorry, I just couldn't resist another one...

Now, that ones really got me thinking... I mean, an arm chair?; thats just so totally and utterly insane man, and in a school?; There should be a whole new subcatogry of sexual deviance just to explain that one. I mean, can you imagine what the school governers would say? Phew, I wouldn't like to be the headmaster having to write a letter to all the pupils parents to explain this one away.... Just crazy, crazier than lampost with its own IP address...


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